Goodbye Mister Flubberbelly (part two)


Wednesday 17 December, 2014 by Uncle Spike

In order to reduce any amount of flubberness, one has to do two things, or so I was told. One is to stuff less calorific substance into the whole beneath your nose, and the other is to move ones body in ways that burns off more more grub than you consume.

Sounds bloody simple really, eh?




I used to be able to eat like a horse; well, by that I mean I used to readily consume large volumes of food, not walk around all day munching grass. As a twenty-sumfink, I would regularly put away four or five full meals a day, shove three burgers down the hatch if they were on offer, eat copious servings of fried food, sample various fermented and brewed liquids, and even munch a few chocolate bars each day. 

Then I hit 30

Within a few months of the aforementioned event, my metabolism changed beyond belief. Then guess what, along came 40 and it was down hill from that point on in the years since… It’s probably a very common experience amongst those who have gone before me 🙂

Someone once told me “You are what you eat”. Now bearing in mind my past lives by that point (yes, plural), that statement brings to mind various unsavoury and best not publicly shared connotations.

Move along a decade and you’ll find Uncle Spike is so boring that I’m gonna have to find some stupid way to pop off this planet, as I eat more healthily than Bugs Bunny. Years ago I packed in drinking and smoking, and these days I rarely consume any measurable dose of caffeine (allergy on that last one). I rarely partake in chocolate (just on the odd occasion), eat a burger every two years, and fast food maybe once a year when visiting friends when we scoff three large pizzas in 30 minutes.



Produce – On the farm we grow much of our own vegetables, salads, fruit, have eggs from our own chickens, and even make soup from the spare chooks. Our cupboards are jam-packed with jam, funnily enough, made from all sorts of home-grown fruits. We have dried foodstuffs galore, including eggplant/aubergine, peppers, tomatoes, raisins, peas etc. We only use olive oil that we produce, make our own pasta sauces, soups, and drink water from the tap which is sourced locally from the mountain spring. Our honey is from the farm next door, and the yoghurt, butter and milk is from another neighbour. The other drink here being sun-sweetened juice from the fruit of our trees (orange, clementine, lemon, cherry, grape, pomegranate).

Bread – One of my most significant dietary changes has been to almost cut out regular consumption of bread. Now, those of you who have been in Türkiye and ever visited a bakery here, will have noticed that our bread is most probably some of the best produced on the planet. I’m not been particularly nationalistic here, but on the whole, we simply don’t have soft bread purchased is polythene bags. Each loaf is prepared by hand and baked in a brick/stone oven fired by burning wood. Here that means pine wood from our local forests. Additives and preservatives are not used, hence bakeries are open serving hot freshly baked bread from 6am until after dark. Bread here is exceptional… and most probably the culprit for part of my problem 🙂 (and probably to blame for the rather rotund shapeliness of our general population). I have now cut that down to weekend breakfasts only, not three times a day which is almost compulsory for Turkish households.



Fresh foods – I no longer pick between meals, don’t pile my plate up like Mt. Vesuvius. I don’t eat sweets, sugar-loaded desserts, avoid most processed foods, never have ready-meals, rarely use shop butter or margarine. Instead I try to only eat natural home-grown or locally-grown food, organic where possible from our farm, and never take ‘supplements’ – food should be grown, not generated in a laboratory in my personal opinion. Blah de blah de blah…

In summary, how BORING have I become, lol??

We will visit the outlaws in Ankara this winter at some point I suspect – me thinks some calorie sampling is well in order, don’t you?


21 thoughts on “Goodbye Mister Flubberbelly (part two)

  1. […] June, and the adoption of a morning regime of 550-750 exercises for a few months, combined with a vast reduction in anything flour based, has enabled the bathroom scales to smile a bit more, with some eight kilos (18 lbs) less to tot up […]


  2. […] time I tackled the basics, that of scoffing less and scoffing better, then the quick-fire initial regime of the 30-Day Abs Challenge to kickstart the old bod into […]


  3. […] in addition to opting to reduce my calorie intake voluntarily, rather than have a plank of wood nailed firmly across my face, I decided to […]


  4. skipmars says:

    Well, Uncle Spike — I ran across your site from a comment you left on the site where I left a comment. And the term “flubberbelly” grabbed me from the get-go. I think I’m a bit older than you (I’m receiving Social Security in America now), and the flubberbelly or flubberjelly wars have been raging now for years. I’m so glad to know that other areas of the world struggle as I.

    I’m at the point of grasping onto any merry-go-ring that explains, excuses and exonerates me from the protrusion that many mistake for my ninth month of pregnancy — which in and of itself would be newsworthy, as I’m a guy.

    Thanks for cheering me up a bit. At the very least I have my writing to fall back on (or into).


    — SM


  5. Your diet sounds very much like mine and, I too, have a problem with caffeine. Makes me all jittery and causes insomnia, so I just have one cup of posh organic tea to kick-start me at the beginning of the day, then it’s mostly water or goat’s milk from thereon-in. I’ve actually lost weight as I’ve got older and need bread to bulk out my diet, or I’d disappear. My new bread machine is an absolute boon and I wouldn’t dream of going back to eating commercially produced stuff that’s full of rubbish.


  6. AnnetteM says:

    I could eat what I liked until I hit 40 and then I couldn’t. It isn’t fair is it. I suppose it has a lot to do with being less active than running around after 3 children. The good news is that it is fairly easy to control for me without the almost saintly measures you are taking. I just have the odd day where I only eat 500 calories if the weight creeps up (maybe once a week) and eat/drink what I like in moderation the rest of the time. I do have a problem with tea though and drink far too many cups in a day!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. fredrieka says:

    momwithoutpaws loves hamburger she has been eating more salads lately and is losing flubberbelly 20lbs so far

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Sue Slaght says:

    Oh that Turkish bread. I remember it well. Yes we have to take good care of these bodies we have, especially as the years tick by.Occasional treats are indeed in order. Your wonderful homegrown food sounds fabulous and definitely not boring.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. But that burger looks awfully, awfully good!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I used to eat like a horse too but now, being in the mid thirties I have become a bit selective in what I eat and in quantity also 🙂

    Oh god, life has become tough 🙂


...waiting to hear from you...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Page Views

  • 558,461 and counting...

Join 2,825 other followers

Posts by Category

Member of The Internet Defense League


© Uncle Spike, Uncle Spike's Adventures, 2013-2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author is strictly prohibited.

Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Uncle Spike and Uncle Spike's Adventures with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Reblogs, pingbacks and other such links in order to use Uncle Spike's material are of course welcomed.

%d bloggers like this: