Boobies On My Wall. Touché Mom.

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Tuesday 18 March, 2014 by Uncle Spike

Granny Spike, a.k.a. mom has always been a handy person. Over her 80 years, she has taken on full bathroom tiling, small-hold farming, dressmaking, cabinet making, gourmet French cooking, gents suit tailoring, watercolour painting, sugar-craft cake icing and all the painting and decorating in all the houses over the decades. I guess that’s where my training all began.

Anyway, when I was 13, my mom said to me, “Spike, you are now old enough to help decorate your own bedroom. I will help you, and teach you how to hang wallpaper properly. In return, you can choose the wallpaper”. Sounded like a fair enough sort of deal, so off we went to town.

Back then, in the late 70’s, there were huge departments in these stores dedicated just to the sales of wallpaper. There were literally hundreds of large heavy ‘books’ that you looked through to choose the pattern and colour of the wallpaper you wanted.

And low and behold… guess what I found?

BOOBIES

Yep, in one such book there was a wallpaper featuring scenes from Les Folies Bergère, that Parisian dance stage show from the late 19th to early 20th century with scantily clad young ladies (well, scantily clad for that day and age anyway).

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There were arguments, appeals lodged, counter appeals, tantrums, sulks and much shaking of heads… BUT, a deal’s a deal, and so we left the store with 7 rolls of ‘babes’ in frilly dancing gear set to adorn the bedroom wall of one 13 year old Spike.

For once, I was the coolest kid around.

Mom wasn’t impressed.

That might have taken place over 35 years ago, but she still seeks revenge to this day me thinks…

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This post has been brought to you by Uncle Spike… but only after reading a post on the Muscle-Headed blog the other day. Thanks Chris. It triggered some old memories 🙂

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